Wow..i have never seen this coming.. me..talking about love..LOVE..my goodness.. to be honest im not really a romantic person.. i believe that LOVE is just a word.. love is just an expression invented by our human mind for the sake of procreation.. and kids..if you do not know.. procreation is vital to the survival of our species..so yeah..its is damn important...anyways..
why the hell did i put up this topic? i don't know!?! i have this rule of being spontaneous when write things on my blog..
are human beings really capable of love? are we really capable of doing anything for the sake of love? sacrificing anything and everything for your one and only... i believe so.. simply because i am in love..but then again this is not a FUZZY WARM BLOG.. this is called FUZZY LOGIC blog..so yeah..sorry to disappoint..=) have we ever stopped and think that LOVE is the same as purpose? as goals? do you believe that every life out there has meaning? has its own purpose.. you know.. look at the tree outside your house..(in case you're living in an urban hell hole then just look for a marijuana 'cannabis sativa' garden sticking on your neighbor's roof) it processes sunlight and create Oxygen as its waste...look at the maggots devouring a cat who didn't look left and right before crossing the street..its eating the corpse turning it into a goo of rich minerals essential to plant life..look at your office mate...working his ass off for his family..most importantly look at yourself..have you been doing what you want in life? if not...then why do you do it? or am i wrong to observe that your doing it for someone else.. for some one else....for some one you love..
perhaps..we all have our own reason why we do things the way we do things..
doing things for others that we love.. sacrificing some things in exchange of things that we want..perhaps things that we need from our loved ones.. doesn't it bother you that everything should be sacrificed? that everything that makes you YOU..should be let go of? think about it.. will it do you any favor to loose yourself..your soul..the thing that makes you HUMAN for your loved ones?? our PURPOSE? personally..i don't believe that everything should be sacrificed.. believe me it is very unhealthy..=)
every human being deserves to be loved..but most of all you must first learn to love yourself..to know that you care about you...BEFORE you care about others..
the point is simple.. if you can not love yourself... then you do not know the meaning of love.. and if you do not know the meaning of love.. then how can you express it? and if you can not express love..how can you love anyone?
so boys and girls..take it from me..i've been there..done that.. i've been alone..so disillusioned of everyone else.. so distrustful of everything..to the point of withdrawing from society.. i've been stuck to an illogical and atemporal thinking that I AM NOT OK...and EVERYONE else is OK....NOT good my friends..not good...=)
Contemplating on a lot of stuff.. and ofcourse reading a bunch of books told me that I am displaying symptoms of this life script that is really really really fucked-up shit!..i mean..WHY!? Why am i fucked up??!? well.. unsurprisingly I've already known the answer to that question.. and i do not want to talk about it right now..(reserved for another topic..not that anyone really bothers.)
..so next question.. WHY THE HELL AM I NOT OK?? well.. cause I am an IDIOT...that's why! hey!.. im not saying this for a self-defeating purpose okaY? i am so passed that.. what i am saying is.. i have always hated myself.. i have perceived myself as inferior to others.. and i have always drawn on this illusion that if I am JUSt this.. and this... and this.. and this... I will be OK.. but you know what?!? I am WRONG.. a person doesn't have to be Intelligent Enough.. to be athletic enough... to be musically gifted..OH my Bad.. let me rephrase that.. strumming-a-wooden-guitar-while-sitting-on-a-sidewalk-eyeing-each-and-every-girl-while-making-sure-they're-cute Enough to be OK..
kids..it doesn't work that way..the first and foremost of all the steps that you have to take in life... is to accept who you are..to know your abilities.. to love each and everything about you..to transcend all there is..
then..everything will fall in to place with clock work efficiency..soon you will see what you want to improve..soon you will know your purpose..soon you will know the meaning of life..of YOUR life.. suddenly you will find yourself behaving that everyday might be your last..your attitude..changed.. your eyes see more clearly..you will embark on a journey to reach your goals..and someday you will look back and see that the first time you loved is the first time you really LIVED..LOVE..gotta love that word.. don't you think? =)
My heart has been tickled with how you've overturned the spirit-drying, brain-wacking, emotionally tormenting dark force in you. It may have taken us countless rise and fall of tides and we may have witnessed how the domestic typhoon names evolved from something worth stretching our locally grown tongues, to something only those with derailed minds fancy about, but we most definitely changed. Really all it took is exposing ourselves to what every day has to offer. Life is a continuous learning. One day we're fine, the other we wish we have never been born to see the cruelty of what society and science brought about. But what keeps our ducks in a row is how we defy nors set by other. They are their own kind. Not every person there is is alike. Who's to tell what's right and wrong. They were never us and we will never be them. We are who we are by how we are programmed from the time our mother let us see the lights strategically chugged in the operating room, and that my younger brother is what makes us unique! No matter how strong the planet's sucking power is, if we keep a good grip of ourselves and learn to stand our ground, we'd still be able to get ourselves together out there!
ReplyDeleteAs for me, with all honesty, I am a work in progress. I still haven't fully survive the ill-stricken blueprint life has taken me. There are moments I constantly weep such as I still feel the unbearable pain i have from within the core of me from time to time. But when sleep ,I sleep it off. I’ve gotten accustomed to leaving it in my dreams. If I am to put a ratio between how happy and sad I am, here's the numerical value - 80/30. Not bad for an emotionally struggling human being.
Keep your post coming. I love reading them! - Ate