Kids

11:10..i was supposed to go the gym..(yeah i know..its not that im vain or anything..but.. i already know the fact that i am now officially a 'Class 1 Obese' BMI >30..so there.) but i suddenly got the impulse to write..or im pretty sure that i just got the excuse not to go the gym again..hehe ^^

here goes..

just got back from the WC to take a nice dump of shit..when i heard kids outside just playing and doing 'kid-stuff'..normally i would be pissed because i hate kids..(there..i said it.. i HATE KIDS..i know its not normal..but i really..really..REALLY HATE KIDS..*grunt*) but this time its weird... i don't feel anything in particular..no hate..maybe that's because i suddenly remembered a scene way back when my mom, and nephew just got here in manila and started to coerce me in spending big bucks for a 'mall-experience' with my sister and girlfriend.. normally i would be pissed yet again because i know that im just going to waste time and money..but perhaps im getting soft..so i really had a good time. back to the scene.. my nephew was buying some stuff on a kiosk and said "Kuya!....ate...pabili ng gummy bear!"..O.K. so im guessing that you already have a picture on your mind about the situation..yes.. the store person..is gay. its funny really.. for us adults..we already have a rough idea to the so called 'Social Norms' established by our society..but kids.. kids will always be kids.. and kids even though their highly advanced relative to the kids way back in the 70's they still retain their innocence or ignorance.. i can not help but laugh..i saw the eyes of the lesbian and perceived its hate, then shame..then it turned again to blank..focused on giving the gummy bears to my nephew. i just looked on 'Denis' (nephew) sensing his apparent innocence as he trudged on to TimeZone where we intend to play.

As much as i hate kids because of their inherent stupidity..(i mean i only see them as little buggers scrambling senselessly to and fro causing havoc all the way)..i now find myself developing significant 'patience' when it comes to dealing with them...hmm.. weird..perhaps im getting old..too old that i am now finding myself drawn to them..their youthful smiles..stupid-goo-gaga eyes...and their cheerful demeanor and outlook in life..a far cry from the cold..calculating eyes of the adults..or better yet a goo-goo-ga-ga eyes of a stupid..idiotic countenance of an immature adult..EEOOWW..*shivers in disgust*

Or am i just missing my old self? back then i was cheerful and carefree... when im not bogged down by 'Social Norms' and so called ethics..there is no doubt about it..a kids life is fun..more fun than the adults..as for me..i just missed it..but im perfectly comfortable with my life as an adult..i have learned what it is to learn as a child..and i did not miss anything (perhaps the good stuff..and good treatments from the old people when i was a kid..yeah i know it sucks..i perfectly understand that..yep..cause im one ugly god damn..fat..smelly..kid..oh yes..i for one will LOATH and mistreat MYSELF when i see my kid-version..God i was UGLY as HELL! oh! i forgot..i have a skin of an aborigine too..so there..) not to be ready for the adult life.

yet everyday when i go to work i see kids hastily embracing the adult way of life. Kids in very short shorts.. kids in high heels..(my definition of kids = from high school down ok? and maybe college with high school cognitive traits..) kids in leggings..with panties saying "HI! Hello! HOw are you?" to the whole world..and to my dick..which is not good.. cause their kids..but it sucks..im a man..i can not help it im sorry....^^

or kids having a smoke..kids supposedly having the adult fun.. but their still kids..to loose their innocence on such a young age will have disastrous consequence..sooner they will loose their child-like outlook in life..sooner they will embrace the adult life..they will force themselves to be adults..or to be 'Adult-like'..they will try to behave like adults while retaining their immature physiology..they will focus all their energies on trying to be an adult.until they get what their wishing for..they will be adults.

and it will suck..they will see that life as an adult is much more complicated, much more tedious and will require a great amount of focus and responsibility. the social norms will bog them down just as it bogged us..and you know what happens next? They will fall...it is for the simple reason that they missed their childhood.. focusing, and obsessing too much on being an adult that they completely missed the childhood lessons..and traits that they will need in adult life.

henceforth..they will retreat..

retreat back to the childhood that they missed..

hence..we see adults behaving like kids..adults obsessed with regaining what they had..obsessed with the past when things are much more simpler.. when they see the world as a playground..see it as full of opportunities for play...for learning..for fun..but now it is all gone.. now they see the fact..that the world is full of threats.. mishaps.. and suffering..

its really sad and disappointing how their numbers swell this time and age..you see them all around us..senseless...happy..smiling..cool..idiotic...popular..idiotic yet again.. and with no ambition..

their doom sealed..

....eternally searching for the one thing that they can never be..

to be a kid.